Jamaica Adventures - Post #8

     Hello everyone!

     We are coming up on my last week (Tomorrow I have exactly 7 days left here) in Jamaica with these Beautiful kiddos, fabulous pod mothers and cooks, and wonderful staff and interns. It is a bit bittersweet. I have to admit, after being here for over 7 weeks, it feels weird to think that my life will be completely different in just a few short days. The stress of last minute doctor visits, bridal shower after bridal shower, moving from city to city for several days, debriefing from my long internship here, leaving home, making new friends, developing a new church community, finding a job, figuring out more permanent housing as Adam and I near our date of marriage, wedding planning galore, and keeping in touch with those I love all over the world sounds a bit daunting and scary to me. 

     But to be honest. I am ready. 

     I am going to miss Jamaica like none other. I am going to miss the many hugs and kisses I get and give each day. I am going to miss the wonderful pod moms who I have had the privilege of getting to know more deeply. I am going to miss my good friends who have run this race with me. I am going to miss the "no problem" mindset of the Jamaican culture and the easy going pace that this country has. I am going to miss a lot of things and a lot of people, but right now I am not feeling sad about leaving. 

     I am confident that I will be here again. Soon. In 5 years, I have been here 3 times. No matter what I do, I cannot keep from coming back. 

     These kids have stolen my heart.

     And I know that until March 12th, when Marah leaves, I will be able to facetime the kiddos back here. 

     And I know that until March 25th, when Taylor leaves, I will be able to facetime the kiddos back here. 

     And I know that until May 1st, when Tasia and Chyanne leave, I will be able to facetime the kiddos back here. 

 

     After that, it will be harder for true (shout out to Danielle), but God is faithful and I know I will one day be able to return here. When I leave and come back, things will be different. Kids may have come and gone. Relationships will have changed. Kids will have grown. Some may not even remember me. But that's okay. Some very wise words have been told to me. There is a time for everything. 

     For now, I am here. 

     In 8, almost 7 days, I will be in America. 

     After that, who knows? 

     My days are filled with the Joy of the Spirit and I am soaking up the time I have left with the wonderful people that I have grown to love here. I love them now and I will love them forever. 

     The internet has made the world a much smaller place, and as I have been for all of my long distance relationships, I am thankful beyond belief. 

     This is not "Goodbye"...this is "See you later."

Jamaica Adventures - Post #7

     As I am writing, I have just finished cleaning up the entirety of the apartment which now houses 5 interns (including myself). God has presented me with many opportunities to love Him and others throughout my time here in Jamaica. I have been reminded many times that my life is not my own. I am not here for myself. My time is not mine. My money is not mine. I don't get to be selfish. 

     

     When I first got here, it was easy to become arrogant, prideful, selfish. Some days it is still easy to become that way. Then I get a reality check. If Jesus was a servant and we always talk about the importance of servant leadership, then why am I pouting when I have so many opportunities to be a servant? 

     

     Why do I feel taken advantage of when I have to do the dishes? Jesus washed His disciples feet. 

     

     Why do I get so frustrated when a child lashes out at me and acts disrespectfully? Jesus was spit on, beaten, humiliated, and hung on a cross. 

 

     Why do I feel protective when someone else is playing with "my" kids? Jesus died for us all and told us to love the orphans and widows. 

     Why do I get annoyed when I have so many opportunities to love and serve the children and adults here at Robin's Nest? Jesus spent His whole life serving and learning how to be more like His Father in heaven. 

     Why do I get burnt out and run down? Jesus took time away to be alone with the Father and allow Him to fill Him up. 

     Why do I take offense when a wounded child, a wounded person, wounds me? Jesus took on all the sins of the world and loves all of creation, even the ones that do not love Him in return. 

     I'm not gonna lie, many days are very hard here. 

     I am far from home. 

     I am trying to plan a wedding.

     I am feeling a bit homesick and burnt out. 

     I am feeling unwanted (by particular children) many days. 

     I miss my fiance and best friend. 

     I miss my mom. 

     I miss my sister. 

     I miss my best girlfriends, and OCC, and family. 

     I miss America. I never thought I'd say that. But I miss our culture and the way we do things at home. 

     I miss being able to walk down the street unnoticed. 

     I miss the guys that just stare. At least they are just thinking lustful thoughts and not calling them out to me or the other interns. 

     I miss the food. The food here is great! Don't get me wrong, but I miss American food. 

     I don't miss the snow or the cold. 

     I miss being able to just go to the doctor that I trust when I am sick for a week and a half. 

     I miss being taken care of by my Mom, Adam, or Marcy. Even though I have had the most wonderful care from Marah, Taylor, Danielle, Nurse Streete, Nurse Reid, Mrs. Townsend, and the rest of the wonderful staff here. 

     I miss being able to understand all the conversations going on all around me all the time. 

     I can focus on all of the things that I miss. As you see, there are many. And honestly, at times, I have focussed on all of those things. I can count down the days until I get back to America (18) or the days until I get to live in the same city as my best friend again (24). I can miss opportunities to love on the people here and to do life with the incredible, amazing, awe-inspiring people here by being so focused on going home. 

     Or!

     I can miss all of those good things that I will soon return home to, maybe cry about it for a while, and then get back out there and love on the people that I am with. 

     It is far too easy to get down and stay in a rut. It is easy to be sad, cranky, or impatient. But Christ calls us to something far greater than that. Sometimes, to get out of that rut, you need someone who is willing to say, "Sorry if I'm being blunt, but you're better than this, Jenna.." even if it hurts in the moment. 

     It's not about me. Hard days will come no matter where we are. But the joy of the Lord surpasses them all. And God throws in moments of light and love to help us get through if we are only willing to open our eyes to Him. 

     Most days here are perfection. I wake up, spend time with God, and love on some pretty amazing little girls who love unconditionally and fully. I swim with them, throw them into the pool, hug and kiss on them, and help them learn new things. I get to hear their sweet voices whenever they see me. 

"Mith Jenna!" *clicking of the tongue*

"Junna!"

"Come!"

"Pray with me!"

"Ay you!" 

     I can tell their voices apart, their cries. I can tell when they're faking, even when others think they are really upset. I know how far they can go into the deep end without drowning and how long they can stay under before I should pull them up. I know who to throw into the pool and who to jump in with. I know who will get angry if I tease them and who see it as a sign of affection and love. 

     I know that Omar wants to play legos, has the best walk, and such a sweet spirit. 

     And Kemar is a great leader in the classroom. 

     I know that Adrian is an amazing speller and an absolute sweetheart. 

     And Howard is a bit slow in his reading, but when it comes to attitude and honesty, I can always count on him. 

     I know that Dwight loves to be the center of attention and has dance moves that can make anyone jealous. 

     I know that Aldane can play alone all day, but loves affection and one-on-one time. 

     I know that Moesha is strong and she loves hugs where you both squeal as you squeeze each other as tight as you can. 

     I know that Sameika loves when you pray for her, but she loves even more when she gets to pray for you. 

     I know that Abby has a soft spot and loves to love on anyone that will let her. 

     I know that Jada is goofy and will get into the arms of anyone that she can and would be held forever if she could. 

     I know that Kimberly understands much more than people think and she can say nearly anything if she just whispers. 

     I know that Rihanna is clever and will pick up nearly anything you teach her. 

     I know that Zoe can push herself on the swing and becomes a favorite of almost everyone who walks in those front doors. 

     I know that Elise can bite. Hard. But she is clever and sweet and incredibly intelligent. 

     I know that Ashley is always happy, except at night. She's always upset at night, but if you hold her jsut right, she is easily appeased. 

     I know that Christopher will probably be an amazing beat-boxer someday and will definitely find a way to get you into that pool if it's the last thing he does. 

     I know that Adrian Macintosh looks tough on the outside, but has a goofy spirit when you can get it out of him. 

     I know that Saneeka is rough around the edges and can push people away well, but deep down she wants people to really try to get to know her and invest in her. She's smart, she knows that not everyone stays.

     I know that Martinez will always ask you to pray with her and will hug you at every opportunity. 

     I know that Saimarr will suck on his fingers all day and he is totally goofy and loveable. Also, he hates being thrown into the pool. 

     I know that Oshaine is a trouble-maker most days, but he needs the love and affection that the other kids get too. 

     I know that Jerome is very intelligent and kind to the little kids. 

     I know that Fabian can get angry, but he loves deeply and when he connects with you, you're in for good. 

     I know that Raymian is quiet and harder to get to know, but he is the sweetest kid you'll ever meet. 

     I know that Kyran has ADHD, but he is an excellent teacher (he taught me some Patois), a killer friend, and incredibly artsy. 

     I know that Kishmar is strong and intelligent and kind. He will avoid homework at all costs, but he will jump on the trampoline and play Kung Fu fighting all day.    

     I know that Demani is an incredible helper. He is trustworthy and kind, even if every other day he reminds us that he is never going back to school again. 

     I know that Jahaeim is a gentleman, he will call out the other boys for being inappropriate and he will let you know when something is going down when it shouldn't be. 

    I know that Danielle is faithful. She does a lot of behind the scenes work on top of her daily interactions with teams, interns, staff, and the children. She follows God wherever He leads her. 

    I know that Taylor is an incredible servant. She helps wherever help is needed. She works with Abby and is patient and understanding. She is so calm and steady. 

     I know that for Marah, no one is a stranger. She loves people deeply and wants to know everyone's story. She lets people know that they are cared for. 

     I know that Chyanne is a visionary. She comes up with many clever ideas on how we can improve and love on the people here at the Nest. She is creative. 

     I know that Tasia is kind and gentle. She is a servant with a mission to do whatever she can and to serve God and others through it. 

     I could go on, and I will. This particular blog post is long enough though. I haven't even started on the staff and the Beauty that shines through them. Next time. If you've been patient enough to read through all of this, I applaud you. Many times I blog right when I am processing through things with God, so sometimes my writing may be discombobulated and messy. Thanks for bearing with me. 

     

     God is good. His love endures forever. 

Jamaica Adventures - Post #6

Hey all! 

     I hope you are all doing well!! Life here at the Nest has been far from ordinary the past several days. Starting on Thursday, I was hit with the flu. I did not think it was the flu...because the flu in Jamaica is apparently much different than the flu in America. My head felt like it was filled with water, when I swallowed anything it felt like I was swallowing knives, and moving too quickly made me feel like I was going to pass out. So, overall I'd say it was a very pleasant experience. Not. 

     God is good though. He gave me two wonderful roommates who took great lengths to care for me! A field coordinator who brought me boatloads of medicine and food. And a wonderful mother and fiance who offered incredible amounts of emotional support from a distance when all I wanted to do was lay in bed, cry, and pass out. 

     My life has been organized chaos since December. I finished my last week at Ozark Christian College as an on-campus student, officially moved out of my parents house since I will be moving to Tennesse when I return to the States, got engaged to the most wonderful man ever, did some wedding planning, and left the country. I can tell you that trying to be present in a country not your own is incredibly difficult all on its own, but when you have so much to look forward to when you return home, it is more difficult.

     While I have been here, I have made it a point to get to know as many of the children as I can, deeply. I'm not about just loving people on a surface level and never getting to know who they truly are. I think God calls us to relationships like that. I want these kids to know that they are safe to talk to me. i need them to know that they can trust me with their questions, hurts, concerns, fears, and secret longings. 

     But I can tell you that hearing a sweet 9 year old boy whisper, "I wish I was adopted..." will break your heart no matter who you are. I can tell you that hearing a 3 year old girl who can barely speak say YOUR name will change you and make every moment worth it. I can tell you that loving that difficult kid who is really a pain in your backside in spite of the way they treat you will work wonders in your life and in theirs. 

     I have to be honest and say that I have seriously considered adopting any and all of these children. I am getting married in a few short months and everything in me wanted to start talking to Adam about starting the process of adopting now. I know it's impossible since we aren't even old enough for the Jamaican system to consider us. But when you see these Beautiful children without a true family, it takes everything in you to not want to make them a part of your own. 

     I cannot explain to you how much this place, these children, these past 5 weeks have impacted me. There is nothing like being sick for 5 straight days and coming back to a houseful of children rushing to hug you. "Jenna!" "Junna!" All of my babies heard my name and rushed to hug me. Little ones are asking, "You feeling betta?" God is good. He is so clearly seen in these children. 

     I'm not going to tell you that it is easy to leave home, go to a place that you don't know well, and live there. But if you get the chance to do something like this, you should. I know we are all busy. Trust me, I'm attempting to plan a wedding from another country, ya'll. I know we don't have time. I'm not asking you to stay for 2 months, but God is doing work in the people around us. We are called to help our brothers and sisters.

     The Jamaican's are our family too. 

     For anyone that might be interested, Robin's Nest has a sponsorship program. It costs you $20 a month to sponsor a child here. You get a picture of them, information about them, and updates on what is going on at the Nest regularly. It's worth it. I've been partnering with Robin's Nest in their sponsoring program since 2010. If you would like to join me in this, feel free to email me at jen.reynolds@sbcglobal.net and I can give you more information about how to get involved. 

     Also, here at the Nest, we do not have a consistent source of water. We are in the process of raising money to build a well here so that we can have that security. If you are interested in donating to that fund, you can follow this link -> https://givemn.org/project/drill-a-well54b533c582a9a. 

     God has been revealing Himself to me more and more each day. He is good. He is faithful. Without Him, we are nothing.